Authors remark: of course no, lets feed them to the pigs 🙂
More and more often we hear about the Scandinavian desire to integrate Yeti-dogs into human-kind society. Obviously the first reaction from any person would explain this as another crazy idea these oily countries have come up with, because they have so much spare money to waste on stupid ideas, but in fact, the main question stays unanswered – is it okay?
We begin with a short story …
… a true story …
It (he) was found in deep Scandinavian woods in 1964 during annual race for Yetis, by a father and his two sons (As we understand it this is some kind of tradition they have for many centuries; people run, scream, holding sticks in their arms and try to kill Yeti, some sort of hunting you may imagine, although it was proved by Vietnamese scientists in 1975 that Yeti meat is not edible).
He was a small and ugly and looked like a dog, which was probably the main reason why he was not gunned down immediately by armed Norwegian savages. Despite elder son’s call to kill little creature, the father said no. He said “lets better take this dog home and let it be a house-dog for our pig-farm, we can always feed him to the pigs if we want.”
Although both sons were full of blood-lust and ready to chop little Yeti into pieces, they knew that nothing could be worse than to disobey their father. And so, for many years the yeti-dog served as a house-dog by scaring away other Yetis from the pig farm. And then one day, this mysterious creature began to speak.
Animal rights activists immediately banned using Yetis as house-dogs as they claimed that they have feelings. Many years this Yeti spent in Vietnamese laboratory (the Vietnamese are the foremost scientific experts on dogs and yetis. Fuck knows why this is) where his brain was continuously examined.
Finally in 1984, global Yeti rights association announced that Yeti are to be considered more than simple dogs. Despite all evidence that Yeti have smaller brain than a toilet bowl and IQ less than 40, the final verdict stated that they should be treated as any other human.
I consider myself to be very lucky since I was able to see the Yeti dog integration with my own eyes. If you ask for my opinion … obviously they are less developed, and they shouldn’t be let close to our women (during annual Yeti conference in Transylvania I requested chemical castration for all Yeti living in Europe, decision is still to be made … ), but otherwise they can fully replace humans as working force in areas like – toilet cleaning, fast food restaurants, hunters, IT consultants etc.
The Kind family shared some pictures from Yeti childhood and elder years.
At 5 years, unshaved
At the barbers
Escaping into society